Step 1 – Self-acceptance
As human beings, we are not perfect. There are parts of us that can be improved on yet there are other parts of us that are just right. You are aware of your good and bad points, the question is do you accept them.
The is the first step in our shine out blog series; self-acceptance. Our surroundings and parental upbringing has often determined how we relate to ourselves in our adult life and how we deal with self-acceptance. If your parents were supportive, kind and loving and when you messed up it was considered to a learning curve, you’ll probably accept yourself. However, if your parents criticised you and were negative with their comments when you made a mistake, then it’s probable that you copy this pattern of behaviour now and berate yourself when you get something wrong.
Self-acceptance is an essential process that allows us to relate to ourselves. This pattern of expression is installed into our mindset and system. Even if you have come from a positive background, you still may not have had the guidance and education that you needed in this area.
That is the key and first step to self-acceptance.
There is no greater illusion than fear
If you have ever suffered any physical or emotional abuse or your parents were loving and kind but how nice they were to you depended on whether you were good or bad, then this will have affected how you view yourself.
Sometimes we are not aware that self-acceptance is an issue for us and that can stop us shining out and allowing the real you to be revealed because you dislike something about yourself.
You may believe that because you don’t like a particular part of yourself, or trait, that it cannot be put on display. You are therefore more likely not to put it on show for fear of ridicule, laughter or negativity. So you put on a front or you wear a mask to present to others a version of yourself that is more likely to be accepted.
Embrace your ‘perfect’ self
The next step is critical to any progress that you go on to make. To achieve self- acceptance, it is key that you find self-compassion. Acknowledge the good AND the bad and know that it is okay to have both. Accepting all that you are right now will not make you lazy, it will, in fact, achieve the opposite, it will empower you to make those changes that you want you.
This critical step requires you to have some compassion for yourself and to say “you know what, I’m not perfect and that’s okay”. Take a look and analyse your imperfections, identify the ones that you accept and the ones that you dislike. This is an important part of linking through to the next step. Before the next phase can be introduced I encourage every woman to think positively and say “I’m doing alright” and by doing so, you’re deliberately making your conscious mind aware and it’s encouraging you to make a personal declaration.
Power of positive thinking
Every day, from this point onwards, repeat positive affirmations to yourself, internally or vocally. This is step one because right now you may be okay to shine but that is not enough. You need to shine out stronger, to be great and to be amazing.
You’re going to challenge yourself and say every single day, “I accept myself for who and what I am now, I accept my good, bad and lovely. I am me and being me is amazing.” You’re going to keep saying that until YOU believe it.
Jasmine Mbye – The Shine Out Trainer.
Specialising in women’s empowerment. Empowering ambitious women to excel.
A challenging childhood left Jasmine ineffective and blocking her own success. Embarking on and successfully completing a journey to become her best, resulted in Jasmine creating the Shine Out Method.
Accelerating your journey to true success with the real confidence and right balance you desire so you go from blending and stressing to standing out and shining.
Check out the Shine Out programme.