I’m one for remembering quotes and things that people said and there’s one that surprised me and really helped me to be true to myself and that is ‘I don’t know the key to success but I know the key to failure is trying to please everybody’. The quote is from a very controversial figure at present, Bill Cosby, who unfortunately it seems has fallen FAR from grace. Nevertheless, his quote remains true. I came across it in my early 20s while in a hair salon and it was perfect timing because I was learning to be me.
When you’re uncomfortable or unhappy with who you are there is a tendency to try to please everyone to validate yourself. So many of us women spent so much of our energy constantly trying to make everyone happy. It’s like a surfer trying to ride a wave without a surfboard, you’re destined for failure. As you and I know it’s impossible to please everyone, people are different and want different things. Learning that at such a pivotal point in my life saved me some more issues because I already had enough.
The other challenge we face as women is there’s this notion that we’re supposed to be nice and make everyone happy. Thankfully, I didn’t fall this one but many of us do. Am I saying don’t bother trying to make others happy? NO! Making others happy brings a joy to our lives but only when we’re being true to ourselves, only when we are ourselves. Sometimes we are to put others first but you’re better positioned to make others happy when you are. Much of our own happiness comes from being happy with yourself and that boils down to loving who you are.
The 3 things to remember are:
- You cannot make everybody happy
- You’re unable to make anyone happy all the time.
- You can make some people happy, some of the time
So cut yourself some slack. Now you can go and be happier.
Until next time.
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