Firstly, let me apologise for the lack of a blog last week. Ladies, (and you gents if you’re reading), last week was one of those weeks where l was encouraged or inspired and wanted to go out and do something with it, only to have one of the worst weeks I can remember in a while :-(. I’m guessing this has happened to you too right? Or, am I alone?
I was professing and encouraging others to profess positively ‘I am…’. So often we say things like ‘I am tired’ or ‘I am okay’ or even ‘I am not good enough’. How often are we saying ‘I am excited’ or ‘I am happy’ or
Have you ever told yourself that? It’s not about being big headed but feeling good about yourself and who you are. If I can see my own beauty, for example, then it will be unsurprising if others do. I can more readily accept positive words. I’m not desperate for approval as I give it to myself. Not everyone had a start in life where they were taught to do this so it’s about learning how to do this. And, you’re never too old.
So I’ve has to learn how to accept myself warts and all, (meaning good and bad). It was a long, hard and lonely road but I’ve made it to tell the tale. This is why I now help others. So even after messing up abysmally and feeling extreme disheartened, (yep I’m still human), I was able to separate who I am from what I did. I made a MESS! However, I am not one, I am still blessed! I failed to meet the mark yet I am not a failure.
I looked at what went wrong and reflected on it. I was honest with myself and took responsibility. Then I identified where improvement is needed and put a plan into place to begin working on. Did I do this all immediately? No way. I gave myself some feeling down time, which was the rest of the day. Then I slept, dusted myself off (as in got up with a fresh attitude) and moved on.
So my steps to overcome a mess up so it doesn’t overcome you are:
1) Distinguish between the mess made and who you are. You made a mistake but you are not one.
2) Give yourself some breathing space. Set a reasonable time limit on how long you will allow yourself to mope, feel down and lick your wounds.
3) Take an honest look at what went wrong and take responsibility. There will be some things that are down to you but not necessarily everything will have been your fault.
4) Identify where you can improve next time. Create a plan of action to minimise this happening again in future.
5) Lastly, move on! We mess up from time to time. The important thing is to learn from it.
These steps helped me and I hope these steps help you too.
You know what really floored me about my mess up. I completely flopped, (that’s London talk for messing up), in my area of strength. I messed up doing something I usually excel at. I didn’t think it was possible for my lack luster performance to be that bad. It was a reminder to keep honing gifts, abilities, talents and skills. A reminder to keep stretching and challenging oneself. A reminder to review what it takes to have peak performance every now and again especially at key times. It was a BIG reminder.
So while I hope this hasn’t happened to you recently, if it has, take heart ladies you’re not alone. I am with you. If it hasn’t, maybe taking note of the reminders could stop it happening for the foreseeable future.
Life is one big lesson so let’s keep learning and growing. This allows us to radiate all the more brightly like we were born to do.
As always I love to know what you think and feel free to share.
Until next time, take care.